Well today is the day. We aren’t very sure if we are actually going to cross the Kenyan border. We are hoping to get by on good looks and diplomatic passports. It’s just one of those things. As Liam says, “it may or may not be a giant ass pain.”
At 0630, we left the hotel bound for the Kenyan border. It was about an hour to an hour and a half drive through one of the coolest places I have ever driven through. We rounded Mt. Meru and the sun was coming up against a row of huge cumulus clouds. Dry gorges from rainy season were scattered throughout. Sparse trees and succulent vegetation lined the road. Children were running in order to make it to school in time. Masai walking around with their herds of cows, goats, and sheep. Yep, it was really cool. And then, a giant giraffe butt was spotted in the distance. This is the crap you dream of as a little kid. And here I am screaming at Liam “Giraffe butt. Giraffe butt. Hurry up. Back up. I gotta get a picture.” He willing obliged - a little unsure - because he didn’t see it at first. Then, giant giraffe head pops up and looks straight at me as if to say, “Yes, I see you too.” My only wonder – what do you think was going through this giraffe’s head. I’m going to go with “Mzungu. Money?” Then, baby giraffe comes walking through the bushes. And stops and looks at me too. Apparently, we are as interesting to them as they are too us. Who’d have thunk it???
Crossing the Tanzania- Kenyan border was uneventful. Accept for all of the Africans walking across the border 200 m from the immigration office and NO ONE giving a crap. TIA (This is AFRICA). I love this place.
Safely into Kenya and my face is PLASTERED to the window after the giraffe. I kept telling Liam to slow down because it was too hard for me to animal watch. Plus, East Africans (I may confirm to be all Africans by the end of this year) drive like crazy people. They have ZERO comprehension of rules of the road. Liam has taken quite nicely to African driving, which means I should be taking Xanax on every road trip and sleeping through the terror. But, I’m not because then what would I write home about?
I diverged. Excuse me. Anyway, face plastered and animal watching. Pretty uneventful until we hit the chaos that exists as Nairobi. At one point there were four roads under construction, all going in the same direction and randomly merging. Still haven’t figured that one out. But, I’m going to blame China like everyone else here. We stopped to get cash and lunch. We ate at the Thorn Tree Café at the Stanley Hotel. Pretty tasty and clean bathrooms. Take note of clean bathrooms as I mention them – they are few and FAR between.
Liam’s local beer review: Tusker – It’s drinkable and cheap. Two very important qualities.
Back on the road and driving away. We meander through the Rift Valley. Um yeah. AWESOME. I can confirm that at almost 9000 feet right at the equator is quite comfortable at a balmy 17 degrees Celsius. I was happy as a clam in my capris, t-shirt, and flip-flops while everyone around me had on wool sweaters and layers. Donkeys, cows, sheep, goats roaming EVERYWHERE. There were patches of forest and green everywhere. It was beautiful and a place I would love to go back and wander. I also want to spend a day with a farmer and find out what all the plants are – it’s a farm feast. Lots of yummy stuff.
At the end of the rift valley, face plastered to the window and I pull another “Zebra butt. Zebra butt. Back up. Hurry. Hurry. I gotta get a picture.” Well I got a few. And probably a little closer to the striped horsey than I should have. As I was creeping closer and closer to my subjects, I could only wonder what was creeping closer and closer to me. But, I just kept telling the Zebra that I thought it was pretty and wanted to say Hi. Didn’t go over so well when they started to run away. I guess they don’t speak English either. Gotta learn how to say that in Kiswahili.
Ventured on through many valleys and hills and mountains. Ignore what you have been told. Kenya is beautiful. I can’t wait to go back to a couple of areas. Especially the coffee fields. Plus, you can get Kenyan coffee for probably nothing (we didn’t buy any because we didn’t have any small bills. Something we have learned, people selling stuff on the side of the road NEVER have change).
Just be leery when the security guy tells you “Back up and go the other way because this road is closed for construction. Don’t worry, that way is better anyway.” Um. Yeah. Not so much. 30 kms of bouncing up and down. I thought pregnancy bladder was bad. Bouncy bladder in African countryside = much worse. Cause it's not like there is even a questionable gas station you can run in and pee pee.
Making it back to the paved road, we spent a little detour looking for our unmarked road. The rest of the drive was interesting. Construction, fog, dusk, light rain and Kenyan driving make for a trial on your patience. But, we made it. Not to the hotel we were planning on staying at, but a bed nonetheless. Nice hotel. Pretty yummy food. AMAZING service. Thank you Imperial Hotel in Kisumu, Kenya. We will probably be back at some point. I hear there are hippos nearby.
Oh and did I mention, we did this all without a cell phone and inaccurate maps. Life is an adventure.
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